Let’s be honest; where there’s digital technology, there’s someone else trying to have sex with it.

Whether you want it or not, if you’re cruising the dating scene, eventually the day will come when the tone of your cheeky characters create an illustrative make it or break it moment when you will be asked, “Why don’t you send me a pic?”.

Sexting a delicious pic of your tasty bits DOES NOT make you:

1. Immoral or desperate
2. A bad person     -OR-
3. The negatively induced and widely misunderstood “slut”

The aforementioned list is clearly a culprit of erotophobia deeply entrenched within our society. In reality the affirmation they are looking for is because they don’t want to look like a tosser in front of someone they're trying to turn on.

Don’t be afraid that you’ll end up sending pictures of yourself drizzling honey with the caption “this is why they call me sugar tits”, then have a sexy-pic-fail meltdown.

Engaging digitally is ALWAYS a negotiation and the rules of consent ALWAYS apply.

Here are a few tips to making sure you have a successful sexy pic exchange.

Start Classy
If you’re entering the mutually consenting agreement, take it to the next super sexy exhibitionist stage with a little foreplay. Don’t just jump in and put the goods on display! This is your chance to get a little creative and play Mistress Tease.

Every great sex act has a great story before it, so take your time and play a little bit. A quick pic of your perfect pout, curvaceous hips, lacey leggings, then cleavage could be the perfect path to getting your potential lovers’ attention and keeping it interesting.

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Know Your Apps
Choose your weapon wisely. If you don’t feel comfortable in someone possibly random having a itillating snapshot of your nekkidness, then that might be something you will want to consider. And NO, they are lying to you when they said they deleted it...trust me.  

Use a digital medium you are comfortable with like, Snapchat (a.k.a. the virtual Ode to Dick Pics). The photos disappear after 3 seconds, which for you and your situation may be more comforting than texting or IMessaging.

If you choose to use a more permanent mode of delivery such as text or email, then have fun with it by adding filters, trying various angles, or use Skype/Facetime which may help make the moment last just a little bit longer and satisfying.

Get Yourself Feeling Sexy
Start by talking a little dirty, then go put on some lingerie, those too tight Armani boxer briefs, or trim the hedges if that’s your thing. This might be show and tell, but don’t forget that this sex act is also for you. If you aren’t even slightly turned on by the idea, what’s the point? The thought of having someone else want to worship you where you are in control of the content can be quite a turn-on.

What’s the key for a sexy snapshot performance? Good lighting.

Don’t take your pictures in the dark and call it artistic. If you’re going to play in the big leagues, stop prancing around the goal line. Remember, this should feel as sensual for you to act as it is to receive. If you don’t feel comfortable, stop--you always have the option to say no.

Stop Self Shaming
We are our own worst critics. Being sexy isn’t about duck-facing, have doubled-up on the bra pumped up breasts, stylized bed-head or the right pectoral pic; it’s about embracing your own beauty, whatever that looks like.

If your potential lover is playfully teasing you with a consensual sext, it’s because they find you attractive. Stop second guessing your sexy self worth. You are a beautiful person inside & out and, all people are deserving of pleasure and intimacy no matter what their body type.

In the wise words of John Mayer “your body is a wonderland” and your sexy sexting digital lover is waiting to discover it.

Amy Schumer does a comedy sketch about getting the right Sext. (Comedy Central)