Week #3: Finding Intimacy in the Funniest of Places

The pain in my stomach became more pronounced Monday afternoon. By Monday night it was just plain bad. Tuesday morning the pain hadn’t gone away and I had to call my husband home from work to take care of our kids.

Luckily my doctor was able to see me that day. As I gingerly hopped off his examination table he calmly explained, “You have a hernia that may need operating on within the next 24 hours. I’m sending you to Emergency to have it dealt with.”

Crap! I don’t have time for this.

I went home and phoned my mom to take care of my toddler. After we bundled up my newborn, my husband and I proceeded to Emergency. To make this long story short, we waited for seven hours in Emergency.

And once we finally saw the surgeon he said, “It’s not life threatening and we have a very busy night. Make an appointment in one week so I can reassess.”

During those seven hours in Emergency, my husband did a marvelous job of taking care of me and our baby.  It was incredibly comforting to know I could count on him and we really were a team.

The closeness I felt to him was amazingly similar to the intimacy felt after a good romp in the sack. Always amazed at the places I can find intimacy as long as I’m open to seeing it.

Getting Back To The Point Of This Blog (AKA The Power Of A BJ)
It's back to figuring out how to make this week about my husband’s sexual needs. I’ve given up on trying to fit/ schedule sex into my son’s weekend nap time. For now, sex has to be at night. Sigh. But, really, it’s not like it takes hours—15 to 20 minutes is the norm—which means I’m in bed at a reasonable hour.

Yet another twist to this week's drama: My husband was given a bad piece of news on Thursday. He, understandably, went into a bad-mood-cave.

Because he took such good care of me at the hospital, I really wanted to reciprocate and take care of him. Give him a little sex pick me up. As the horizontal mambo was out of the questions because of my hernia, I decided on a little oral sex.

I am a bit sheepish to admit it’s been a while since I performed an exclusive blow job (god, I hate that expression) and was a bit rusty. Not surprisingly, my husband didn’t seem to notice my forgotten BJ techniques I gleaned from Lou Paget’s fabulous book, How to Be a Great Lover.

Given the bounce in his step afterwards, it was a successful pick me up. Mission accomplished.

From An Impartial Sex Expert’s Viewpoint
Oral sex is efficient, effective and brings no end of happiness to the recipient. Really must remember this when I don’t feel like having intercourse but still want to have a little bit of sex.

Next week: It's about my needs. (Hooray!!!) I was going to try out something a bit exotic but we’ll see if the hernia has healed enough to do it. Also curious to see if my husband is, once again, unenthusiastic to join in when it’s all-about-me sex. (Boo!!!)

About The Author

Trina ny head n shoulders
Trina Read
Sexologist, Dr. Trina Read is the founder of The Business Of Sex Speaker Agency. She is a leading relationship and sexual health expert and educator; and is a best selling author, media expert, was a CBC radio Relationship columnist, syndicated blogger, international award winning speaker, newspaper & magazine columnist, and spokeswoman. Follow her on Twitter and Facebook.
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