My husband likes to have sex every day if possible…Is that normal??

I sometimes think the downside of living in a world where we talk a lot about sex is that people inevitably look to statistical or anecdotal information to see how they ‘measure up’. In a world where ‘more’ supposedly means ‘better’, our sex lives can start to feel like a contest.

Let me clear something up first–there really is no such things as ‘normal’ when it comes to the amount a couple has sex. A couple’s sexual relationship is as unique and varied as they are and is likely to change throughout their life cycle for a variety of reasons (pregnancy, child rearing, stress, aging, etc).

For some couples, once a month is fine, others prefer several times per week, others still a few times a year. The problem potentially comes when one partner wants sex much more (or much less) than the other partner and doesn’t feel like they can discuss it.

On that note, the first thing I thought when I read your message is: do you like to have sex every day too? If not, and if your husband’s desire to have daily sex feels like an expectation or imposition, then I would suggest you have a conversation with him.

Keep in mind that sometimes people feel like they need to reserve sexual energy for their partner, not realizing that their partner might be just as happy if they used masturbation as well.

I also think sometimes people haven’t learned about the many ways we can be intimate with our partners that go beyond sex–and in this case it might be worth seeking out a marital counselor to discuss.

Other Cynthia Loyst Blogs
Craving a Massage with a ‘Happy’ Ending
Man Can’t Orgasm During Intercourse
Your Guide to Kissing Properly

Outspoken, hip, irreverent – yet enlightening, Cynthia Loyst is a TV host, advice columnist & relationship coach who likes to ask uncomfortable questions. She’s also a certified life/relationship coach and guest expert on a variety of shows including The Marilyn Denis Show, CTV Newsnet and Etalk. Follow Cynthia on Twitter.