Butterflies flutter around in your yoga-tuned tummy as a reel of the romantic sorts plays in your mind. Anticipation at it’s finest, one might say. The day you have been waiting for has come. That day is today. When the sounds of the ever-so-dreadful alarm go off – to which you usually hit snooze – you instead welcome it with nothing short of a smile. Alas, you think to yourself, today has come.

For those of you pretty little ladies who have anticipated anything and everything from first dates, to work related promotions, to big news, to a special event, you know the luxury that is finally getting to that point. The only problem with looking forward to things is that – if we let them – they have the power to disappoint. This is why it is ever so important to be realistic with your idealizations.

Exhibit A: Guy likes girl. Girl likes guy. Guy asks girl out on a date. Guy and girl schedule date, go about daily banter leading up to it, practically envision themselves an item from the getgo, then date comes and the chemistry just isn’t there.

Hopefully this isn’t the case, and chances are if he gives good banter, he likely gives good everything else, but keep an open mind.

Realize that what becomes essential in romance is two people who care about and are excited about one another in a balanced and equal way. Don’t force something if it isn’t as good as you expected it to be or, alternately, don’t resist and hold back from what seems natural for fear of things being too rushed. ‘Too soon’ is by a myth. It all comes down to trusting your instincts and allowing things to unfold naturally in your relationships.

When one is realistic with the notion that things can happen or occur in a day that we can’t prevent, then you’ll be more able and willing to role with the punches. Accept what is instead of trying to force what is not. If you go into one of those to-be phenomenal days with this mind set, however it plays out will be but a bonus.

Other Jen Kirsch Blogs
Women Want Bromances Too
Women Stop Misreading Your Dates
Toss the Tee and Throw on a Pair of Heels

Jen Kirsch is a relationship expert, columnist and blogger. She writes for ELLE, Canadian Living, Slice TV, Women’s Post, AOL Lifestyle, Notable.ca, ELLE Canada, Sympatico.com, The College Crush, Rebecca Eckler’s How To Raise A Boyfriend, PostCity Magazines and many more publications. Often seeked out for her to-the-point advice, Jen offers coaching sessions to singles and couples who want some direction in the dating world. Read her blog and follow her on Twitter.

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